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My heart is heavy and so is my brain. I feel I’m slowly going insane. Constantly consuming carbohydrates my body can no longer hide it. So what on earth am I to do to reach my goal of eight stone two.

Each morning I wake I step on the scales and I say to myself “now hales!” If no weight is lost and no weight is gained, the present weight still remains. So don’t be down hearted, you can reach your target. Just remember, that patience is a virtue, there will be a slimmer you.

I have exhausted all the diets, to my horror, the Weight Watchers scales were incredibly unbiased. And so I embarked again on the lonely road that is weight loss, which I have to confess, I find a struggle, it’s so frustrating and it makes me feel cross.

So I continue to battle with my unconscious mind, I tell myself that each day is a step forward and not two behind. What I feel inside I try to hide, not successfully, as the thoughts in my head are mirrored outwardly.

The introjects with in me are so strong, it is incredibly frustrating why does it take so long. To rid the pounds that I have gained there is no one else to blame. So I am the one, the only one, who can loose the weight and embrace love instead of hate.

Food is my enemy, food is my friend. Food is a substance that will never end. The ambiguous relationship I have with food, doesn’t ‘alf affect my mood. One minute I’m up and one minute I’m down but on the whole without a frown.

Now I have just ten pounds to shed, and all that energy burning in my head, makes me feel rejoicing. Ordinarily my mind is Optimistic and that life’s’ for the taking, but bloody hell” this dieting lark ‘ant ‘alf frustrating!.

Copyright Hayley Day July 2004/2020.

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