What Does It Really Feel Like to Be in Psychodynamic Psychotherapy? (And Why Therapists Go Too)

something new

“psychodynamic psychotherapy is not about fixing. It’s about understanding.”

If you’ve never been to therapy, it can feel a bit mysterious—maybe even intimidating and strange. People talk about it in hushed tones or with that half-joking, half-serious line: “I probably need therapy for that!” But what is the actual experience of being in psychotherapy? What does it feel like to sit, week after week, across from another human being and let the layers of your life slowly unfold?

And perhaps less often talked about: what is it like for therapists themselves to be in therapy? And why does that matter?

Let’s slow down and take a closer look together.

The Therapy Room: More Than Just Talking

A space to breathe

At its heart, psychotherapy offers something surprisingly rare in modern life: a quiet space, held safely, where you can speak freely—and be truly heard alongside challenges to how things are seen and what they might mean for you.

For many, it begins with uncertainty. “What am I supposed to say?” The truth is, there’s no right answer. Therapy doesn’t demand accomplished stories or perfect words. Instead, it invites whatever is real: confusion, sadness, frustration, hope, anger, envy, love.

Little by little, people often notice something they didn’t expect. Beneath the words, something shifts. Thoughts begin to untangle. Feelings rise—sometimes uncomfortable, sometimes tender. It can feel like stretching muscles you forgot you had, and at times as sore.

And then, somewhere in the stillness, patterns emerge. Old fears. Repeated hurts. Forgotten strengths.

Why Therapists Need Therapy Too

Therapists are human first. We carry our own histories, blind spots, and emotional bruises. Being in therapy ourselves allows us to keep noticing those shadows—so they don’t unconsciously spill into the work we do with you.

Therapists in therapy

More importantly, it reminds us what courage it takes to be a client. To show up, even on the days you’d rather hide. To speak painful truths. To stay with discomfort instead of running from it.

In the quiet of their own therapy rooms, therapists learn something essential: how to hold uncertainty without rushing to fix. How to sit with not knowing. How to trust that insight comes in its own time.

These lessons are what make psychotherapy a living, breathing relationship—not a cold and robotic technique.

The Experience: A Tapestry of Emotions

People often ask: How will I know if therapy is working?

The answer isn’t always straightforward. Therapy isn’t in a straight line. Some weeks feel like breakthroughs; others feel like circling the same ground over and over. Some sessions leave you lighter; others stir up heaviness.

This is normal.

Psychotherapy works by creating a space where the unsaid can be said, where the unseen can be gently brought into the light. It’s not about feeling good all the time. It’s about feeling in touch with the truth. And from that, change begins.

What You Might Notice Over Time

• You start recognising old patterns in relationships—and making new choices.

• You feel more able to sit with uncomfortable emotions instead of reacting automatically.

• You develop a kinder inner voice, one that isn’t always criticising or rushing you.

• You find yourself more present in your life, less caught in autopilot.

The therapist’s own experience of being in therapy helps them walk this path with you—not from a place of clinical distance, but from shared humanity.

Would be good for a change

A Final Thought: The Courage to Begin

Starting therapy is an act of quiet bravery. So is continuing. So is showing up when you’re not sure it’s working.

And behind every therapist is someone who has sat in the other chair—who knows that vulnerability from the inside. This is what gives the work its depth, its tenderness, and its strength.

Whether you’re considering therapy for the first time, or you’re curious about what makes a therapist who they are, the message is the same: you don’t have to do this alone.

We’re all, in one way or another, learning how to understand ourselves.